Get Your Real Success — Use Something BETTER than Willpower!

pitchconfidenceworkshopadYes — you can do better in life and business.

You need to be skilled to overcome The Deadly Three: Fear, Hesitation, and Procrastination.

How? Build your “Extreme Confidence Skills.”

The Golden Key for Real Success: Replace Willpower with a System
Researchers at Stanford University identified that willpower is like a muscle; it wears out as the day goes along. That’s why I eat salad for breakfast.

[Special Note: You do NOT even need motivation. For example, I’ve coached clients to automatically send an email after completing a marketing phone call. No hesitation. No getting up to use the restroom. No time to let the writing of the email become a bigger, scarier activity. Just an automatic behavior — which is part of a Good System.]

To perform at your best, you need something more powerful than just being confident about “the text” – that is, the actual words of your speech, pitch or sales presentation.

Here’s the solution: You learn special methods I call “Recovery Methods.” Then, you’re confident that you can handle anything that comes up. With this extra level of confidence, you rise to what I call Extreme Confidence. Then you can Perform at Your Best.

A prime element of Extreme Confidence is training in ways to adapt to anything that arises.

For example, let’s say you’re giving a speech, pitch or sales presentation … What if your mind goes blank? Extreme Confidence skills provide you with Recovery Methods so you handle tough moments with poise.

Here’s the important distinction: Rehearsing the text is not enough. You do better when you rehearse Recovery Methods.

Recovery Methods are techniques we use to regain our balance when something goes wrong. Recovery Methods are a foundational part of Extreme Confidence.

Extreme Confidence is when you KNOW that you know how to adapt to anything that arises.

For the times when you need to be on your toes, you need to be able to adapt and pivot quickly.

Here’s an example. I was giving a speech at IBM. My mind went BLANK. I was stuck. Inside, I felt: “Augh! I’m so embarrassed.”

What could I do? What would you do?

On the inside, I was panicking. On the outside, I took a breath and said, “I’ll need to pause for a moment. My brain needs more RAM.”

Those tech folks at IBM thought that a RAM (Random Access Memory) joke was hilarious!

As I work with a client, I help her find her own language—those words that feel comfortable specifically for her. Then we practice. I call out: “Your mind just went blank. Use a Recovery Method.”

This helps my client rise to the level of Extreme Confidence. She gets to the point that she KNOWS that she can recover—and truly connect with her audience.

Conventional Approach: Rehearse the text.
Extreme Confidence Approach: Rehearse Recovery Methods, too.

Here’s the Point: You rehearse Recovery Methods so you feel an extra layer of confidence throughout your presentation.

Special Note:
Earlier I mentioned: The Golden Key for Real Success: Replace Willpower with a System.

When I work with a client, we plug the person’s unique situation into a number of systems.

Here is an example.

One of my clients, Susan, wanted to give a speech. I introduced her to Elements that Create a Great Connection with the Audience (a system). As part of this process, I worked with Susan so she had options:

  • 3 options for a bit of self-deprecating humor
  • 3 options for a detail that shows your vulnerability
  • 3 options for a detail that reveals your “youthful” enthusiasm that got you connected with [her topic]. (I said, “We’ll place this into a story. Your enthusiasm will wash over the audience. And, enthusiasm is attractive.”)

After we had the options, we could test which elements were a good fit for Susan, and we could see how test audiences responded.

My point is: With a system, you do NOT have to force yourself to create a great performance. Working with a coach makes the whole process doable and often so powerful that you’re surprised.

Vital News: Attend Tom Marcoux’s workshop “Pitch with Extreme Confidence: The Pitch Hacking Method” on April 20, 2017.  You will learn to:

· Experience Real Confidence
· Seize the Investors’ Attention
· Answer Tough Questions with Poise
· Let Go of Fear and Nervousness
· Use Confident Body Language
· Handle Tough Moments (even if your mind goes blank)

Click here to register – early bird fee of $10.00

Free Yourself from Fear

Free Yourself from Fear — use methods in Tom Marcoux ‘s book The Power of Confidence

“What keeps people stuck?” my friend Anita asked.

Fear keeps people stuck in many situations,” I replied.

“Is it really possible to release ourselves from fear?” she asked.

Now, we’re stepping into areas of philosophy and practical ways to raise our levels of success and fulfillment.

“Everything you want is on the other side of fear.” Jack Canfield

From interviewing successful people, I’ve learned that they have certain patterns in place in how they approach problems and situations. They certainly feel fear, but they do not let fear paralyze them.

Some people don’t like change, but you need to embrace change if the alternative is disaster.
  Elon Musk

The path out of fear-based paralysis is change.

How do we do that? I’ve learned that you can just sit there and something will likely push you and the consequences may be truly painful.

However, the empowered state of being is to make choices. I’ve learned that it helps to condition oneself to take an empowered stance when dealing with fear.

To Free Yourself from Fear, Use this Pattern: Face it –> Flip it –> Forward it

  1. Face it.

Name it. Call it out. When we allow fear to hide in the dark, it feels bigger. However, if you name the fear, you can use that step as the start for ascending a staircase.

With Ned, one of my clients, I started a particular conversation with: “What are you afraid of?”

“We don’t have enough sales. I’m afraid we’re going to go out of business,” he said.

“Okay. That’s a good start. What can you do to improve sales?”

“I don’t know,” Ned began. “Maybe work with a coach on improving sales. Read some books. Work with my team. Interview some previous customers and ask why they bought our products,”

“Good ideas, Ned. So which of these ideas does your gut say is the one to begin with—today?”

The point here is: Ned could make improvements once he expressed his fear and then tossed some ideas on the table.

Now it’s your turn. What are you afraid of? Write this down, and then note some possible actions you can implement.

  1. Flip it.

The idea of “flip it” is to turn over or transform the fearful thought to something empowering.

As an Executive Coach, I often help clients open their awareness to new facets of a situation or problem. I often ask a question that opens some expansive thinking possibilities for the client.

When appropriate, I introduce my client to a principle that can help him or her shift to an empowered point of view about a situation. I mention to my clients that I have three hats of “coach, consultant and mentor.”

I’ll now share with you my idea “Mentor On Your Shoulder.” (My further guidance/blog posts are available at

Your “Mentor On Your Shoulder” Keeps Certain Principles Accessible in Your Mind

Here we’re looking at “Mentor on your shoulder” as a metaphor to having someone near you to tell you valuable principles when you need them.

The process is to memorize certain phrases which stand for principles that a mentor would share with you.

Here are examples of such phrases:

a. “If in doubt, leave it out.”

On certain occasions, you can save yourself a lot of trouble, by restraining yourself from certain actions. People often say, “I knew I should not have done that.” When you recall the phrase “If in doubt, leave it out,” you can pause and perhaps, simply avoid some action that could make a situation worse.

b. “No hesitation.”

Sometimes, my team faces “creative stuck-points.” For example, recently, we needed to design a Dragon-character for my graphic novel series, Jack AngelSword. I said, “No hesitation!” and encouraged myself and two artists to jump in and draw a bunch of quick sketches. I’ve found that pressing on can help release one from hesitation, fear or being baffled about what might be a solution. I’ve said, “I’ll find out when my pencil is on the sheet of paper.” This means that I’ll find a solution as I’m actually drawing some sketches.

c. “Better than zero.”

I’ve noted that several artists and others get stuck with forms of perfectionism. I suggest making some form of progress. For example, even just 10 sit-ups a day is “better than zero.” Two quick sketches for a logo is better than nothing on the paper. Often one just needs to get started and then the ideas flow.

d. “Face the numbers and adapt from there.”

Several years ago, I was directing a feature film which called for a dream-related flying scene. The first thing was to consider a conventional way to get the effect done. I faced the numbers: $5,000 for a studio rental and some “wire-work.”

Instead, I adapted. I used a darkened garage, stood on a black tarp, and moved the camera (combined with a fast zoom-in). The cost? – when the image was composited during editing (back then at an editing studio) $100.00.

The idea here is to avoid letting fear shut down one’s thinking. Start with the conventional and then adapt and move out from there.

Steven Spielberg is noted for staying under budget when making each of his films. He made JURASSIC PARK for $63 million. To stay under budget, he cut a scene with the heroes in a river raft besieged by pterodactyls. (That scene finally saw production in JURASSIC PARK III.) Even Spielberg adapts.

  1. Forward it

I’m using forward here in the manner of “move forward.” Take some little step forward. Perhaps, it’s sending out an email to some friends and acquaintances asking for ideas to solve a problem. Maybe you’ll call your team together for a brainstorming session.

Even a simple Google search can help you take a step forward.

When you’re in action, you’re focused, and fear is a quiet voice in the background.

In summary, if you’re experiencing fear that’s like a vicious dog pinning you in one place … then use the Face It –> Flip It –> Forward It Process.


Tom Marcoux
Executive Coach
Spoken Word Strategist

Pitch Coach

CEO (leading teams in United Kingdom, India and USA)

Speaker-author of 41 books (with free chapters on )
Author of Soar With Confidence: An Executive Coach Reveals Secrets, Lies and Countermeasures So You Excel Like Top CEOs and Leaders – Pitch, Lead, Succeed (See more when you CLICK HERE )
1.8 min. video (on YouTube): Tom Marcoux pulls back the curtain about how his directing a feature film that went to Cannes Film market helps with “Building Your Brand”:
Author of Reduce Clutter, Enlarge Your Life (See more when you CLICK HERE )
and Year of Awesome! (See more when you CLICK HERE )