Overcome the #1 Problem for Introverts and Networking

 

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June 11, 2018 Course begins

“I hate networking. It’s people trying to fake being interested in each other, but they’re all just trying to sell stuff to each other,” my friend Amanda said.

 

“I can hear how uncomfortable you are about networking. Do you have a guess why it bothers you so much?” I asked.

“I’m an introvert. I lose energy when I go to someplace where there’s a lot of people,” Amanda replied.

As an introvert, years ago I found it really tough to go to networking events. Just thinking about going to a networking event had me feeling tired ahead of time.

Then I learned the solution for an introvert at a networking event. The solution includes thinking it through and then rehearsing it through—in terms of asking certain questions.

The solution for an introvert is to actually make the most of your Introvert Advantages. (That’s the solution for the Networking Problem of dreading the effort to try to be impressive.) As an introvert, you are likely a good listener. An introvert tends to not interrupt a speaker—as much as certain extroverts.

Additionally, an introvert will listen carefully and think it through before they express a response. This makes the other person happy. Why? Because they feel heard. (Perhaps, you, as an introvert, are giving them better listening than they get at home.)

So, The Introvert’s Solution to Networking includes 3 Elements:

  • Change your focus from trying to be impressive to being a good listener. Tell yourself, “I’m going to help this person feel great because I will listen to them a lot.”
  • Rehearse good questions (“What’s one of the best compliments that you’ve heard from a customer?” – “How did you get started in your business?” “What are you looking forward to?”)
  • Provide really good Reflective Replies. A Reflective Reply sounds like: “That sounds frustrating.” – “That sounds like it was a tough situation—then what happened?”

As an introvert, I want to help other introverts really improve their process of gaining clients.

So, I made 2 VIDEOS that will help you

  • Use the #1 Secret Introvert’s Use to Get Clients and learn to avoid the 3 Biggest Mistakes
  • Work well with the “money objection”

Go to https://getthebigyes.com/introverts-success/

I trust that you’ll want to learn more.

On June 11, 2018 my online course –

A 3-week Intensive Online Course “Introvert’s Formula to Get Clients” begins.

I also created a Special Bonus for you

“The Toolkit for Closing Transactions at $12,000 or Higher.” —when you register for his course Now. With this special offer.

Find out more and enjoy the 2 Videos at https://getthebigyes.com/introverts-success/

No matter what—you’ll learn valuable methods.

Check it out now.

Warmly,
Tom

Tom Marcoux
Spoken Word Strategist – Executive Coach
Speaker-Author, 45 books so far 🙂
CEO


PitchPowerFest.com * GetTheBigYes.com


 

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“Marcoux demonstrates how to “Prepare a Compelling Story that Moves Emotions.” He mentions techniques that he teaches clients for developing compelling Ted Talks.” – Dantalion Jones

Use the One Step That Brings Your Higher Success

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Attend Oct. 25, 2017 – FREE Workshop “Power Up Your Brand: Attract Clients”

“I’ve got too much to do!” my client, Amanda, said.
“I hear you. It’s in your voice. You’re feeling overwhelmed, right?” I said.
“I can’t get it all done!”
“That’s true,” I said.

As the Spoken Word Strategist and an Executive Coach, my clients expect me to tell them the truth and cut through the cluttered-thinking we may fall into.

Do you notice these details? …

  • You canNOT get it all done
  • Some areas, you do well
  • Some areas, you’re clogged up
  • A bit of insight does not kick you into action

It’s not insight that gets you off the floor.

It’s a System. Don’t make a big production out of the idea of a system.

Let’s call “system” something else: An Effective Pattern.

Every day, I write. My clients ask:

  • Tom, could you help me with my speech, website and press release?
  • Would you help me with sound bites for my appearances on TV, radio and podcasts?
  • Could you help me write the video so I get sales?
  • Help me write my Online Course, okay?
  • You mentioned that this book needs to be strategically written and positioned so I’ll be speaking at conferences, working with high-end clients and appearing in the media. What do you suggest?

I have no hesitation. I jump in and write. Not because I feel like it. (I often do not feel like writing.) I have a full menu of Effective Patterns so I write immediately.

Now, let’s add an Effective Pattern to your day:

Reduce Feeling Overwhelmed with this One Step

I’ll now share an Effective Pattern (system).

Here’s One Step that will get some things off your scheduleSort your tasks into two categories (I call them “boxes”). Picture that you have two boxes in front of you. Box #1 is your “Consider Box.” Box #2 is your “OTA Commitments box.*”

** OTA stands for “On Time for Airport” Commitment. I don’t know anyone who does not take special care to get to the airport early to ensure they board their flight.

In essence, you choose what you will consider doing at some point, but you’re not going to fret about these things this current week.

You’ll save your precious energy because you’ll avoid criticizing yourself for failing to get everything done.

Secondly, you focus on your most important commitments. For example, at this moment, I’m writing 2,000 words a day (for my 45th book). This is an OTA Commitment.

My clients reduce a significant portion of their workload by making that choice to separate things they’re considering from that which is essential.

For example, I canNOT reach out to everyone I have met who might need my special combination of Spoken Word Strategist/Executive Coach work.

I must focus on my Highest Priorities. I contact first, the most promising people to be a match for me as their Spoken Word Strategist – Executive Coach.

Now, it’s your turn. You can reduce your stress by sorting “stuff to consider” and OTA Commitments.

Answer these questions:

  • What’s most important to you about ______ (your career, your family, bringing love into your life …)?
  • What Top 3 Things can you do this week that will make the Best Difference?
  • What can you “toss into your Consider Box” – and off your plate?
  • What’s in your OTA Commitments box?

Sometimes, I’m working with a client and I have to say something brief to shake the person up.

My client, Amanda, runs her own business. She said, “I don’t know what to do next.”
“You’re asking about your business, right?” I ask.
“Yes.”
“Here’s a principle related to keep your good company going.”
“What is it?”
“Go get the money.”

I explain that, during work hours, the thing to do is get the money: Send the invoice, make the marketing call, create your online course, rehearse your speech and so forth.


Focus on The Power of Three

I encourage my clients to focus on “The Power of Three.” By this I mean, identify three most important steps … or three speech titles … or three most important marketing methods.

I’ve seen several other business owners get stuck in a pattern of “Oh, look! That new thing is shiny.” They do a little of one marketing method, get bored, and search for something new and ‘shiny’—the next class or book.

Instead, you’ll massively improve your productivity by choosing THREE, and you’ll avoid spreading yourself too thin.

In summary, the One Step that Brings You Higher Success is to sort your tasks into the Consider Box and the OTA Commitments Box.

Focus! Take action on your Top Three Most Valuable Tasks.

Warmly,
Tom

Tom Marcoux
Spoken Word Strategist
Executive Coach

CEO
Speaker-author of 44 books

GetTheBigYES.com


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Get the Advantages to take your business to a higher level. Learn Leadership Advantages, Pitch Advantages, and Success Advantages. To Soar with Confidence, you learn and use principles for top level communication to board members, team members and the media.
“Marcoux demonstrates how to “Prepare a Compelling Story that Moves Emotions.” He mentions techniques that he teaches clients for developing compelling Ted Talks.” – Dantalion Jones

 

51kgz7eafllDarkest Secrets of Making a PITCH for Film and Television: How You Can Get a Studio Executive, Producer, Name Actor or Private Investor to Say “Yes” to Your Project

Learn the vital skills of pitching your ideas and enrolling others into your vision. Get that “Big Yes” to funding your project. “This insightful book shows you how to zing a curveball right past the parts of the Hollywood exec’s brain that want to say no before you even make your pitch. You will learn what works when pitching, and more importantly, why, so you can get to YES much more often. Buy this book now. Consider it Spring Training before the big game.” – Danek Kaus

coverfromamazonDarkest Secrets of Persuasion and Seduction Masters: How to Protect Yourself and Turn the Power to Good

This invaluable guide, used by people in 15 countries and now in its second edition, will help you become immune to dark persuasion. Learn to use countermeasures to defend yourself against unethical persuasion and seduction tactics. Break any trance in which a salesperson is trying to get you to buy something not to your benefit. “Learn how to defend yourself against manipulation. Best book you’ll ever read to protect yourself, feel strong and move forward in your life. Highly recommended!” – Dr. JoAnn Dahlkoetter

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Learn how you can tap into your natural gifts and tendencies to radiate Three Types of Charisma. Discover how to influence people with your words. “Marcoux explodes this myth: Charismatic people always feel comfortable before and during an important event, such as public speaking, networking or some other social event. This book shows how you can feel discomfort but still come across as confident and charismatic.The secrets include ways to radiate all three forms of charisma Marcoux describes as Warm Trust Charisma, Natural Charm Charisma and Magnetic Charisma.” – Danek Kaus

51yx0dowsnl

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5-28-17)FINAL2_amazingyouVers6webAmazing You: Enjoy the Power to Get It Done, Get Stronger, Get Credit for It … featuring Secrets of Extreme Confidence

Would you like to Amaze yourself? This book helps you Get Stronger so you can Get It Done! You’ll learn how you can Get Credit for It! All three elements are crucial so you rise to a higher level of success and happiness. Think about it. If you get it done, but you’re a physical wreck—you lose. If you get things done, but you don’t Get Credit for It—you cannot get new clients. And, you’ll lose your current clients—if they don’t know, in their gut, how their lives are better because you’ve brought them significant benefits. Here’s a secret: You can unleash the Amazing You! Executive Coach Tom Marcoux helps you develop Extreme Confidence. “Tom Marcoux, once again, has written a book filled with practical insights and veteran business expertise that allows individuals to acquire the tools to balance personal and professional life. Tom’s wisdom possesses depth and the experience of someone who has ‘walked the walk.'” – Dr. Arthur Ciaramicoli

Be Yourself, Continue Forward Even When People Don’t Hear You

Be yourself -- even when some people "cannot hear you."
Be yourself — even when some people “cannot hear you.”

“I overheard something that bothered me a lot,” my client Amanda said. After a big breath, she continued, “I heard someone at my office say, ‘Amanda said some self-aggrandizing stuff in her speech today.”

A combination of sadness and panic came upon Amanda’s face.

“What did I do wrong?!” Amanda said.

“I’m not sure that you did anything wrong. How about I ask you a couple of questions?” I asked.

“Okay.”

“Did you tell the truth?” I asked.
“Yes.”
“Were you making an important point?”
“Yes.”
“Did you talk about something you learned?”
“Yes.”
“Did you show how you went from making a mistake to succeeding at something?”
“Yes.”

Then Amanda’s facial expression changed, and she said, “Oh …”
“Oh, what?”
“I don’t think that person heard my whole story.”
“Exactly!” I said, smiling.

In our discussion, I went onto point out:

  • Sometimes, people don’t hear your whole story. They get stuck on one detail.
  • Sometimes, several people will never align with what you’re talking about. And it’s necessary to acknowledge that fact.
  1. Sometimes, people don’t hear your whole story. They get stuck on a detail.

I’ve noticed something recently. Sometimes, people literally do not hear one crucial word. Just yesterday, my sweetheart made a comment, and a friend, Joe, did not smile at her humorous detail.

I noticed this, and said, “Oh. She just added a funny detail about valium.”

“Valium? Oh, I didn’t hear that,” Joe said.

Sometimes, people actually do not hear what you said. It can be a physical difficulty. Many of us have some form of damaged hearing due to loud music on mobile devices, concerts – and loud movie theaters.

Secondly, some people stop hearing you after one particular detail.

One of my clients, Wendy, told an audience of entrepreneurs that Bill Gates got a $50,000 loan from his father to buy an operating system that he renamed as MS-DOS. She discovered that many people tuned out because they felt that Bill Gates had been “born with a silver spoon in his mouth.”

So the truth is: In every audience, you are likely to find that some people never hear your whole story. They get stuck on one detail, and then hear nothing more of what you express.

 

  1. Sometimes, several people will never align with what you’re talking about. And it’s necessary to acknowledge that.

One of my mentors said, “If you even mention that you wrote a book, some people in the audience will take offense.”

“How?” I asked.

“Just by mentioning your book, to these particular individuals, you’re selling something. And it bothers them. A lot,” my mentor explained.

Ultimately, many of the top speakers in the world get to the point where they flow with the reality that they will always have people who miss the message they’re offering.

“30% will love you. 30% will hate you. And 30% couldn’t care less.” – Gabrielle Reece

I add to the above comment with: “Do what you do. Don’t let it stop you that 60% of the people may not be with you.”

For a speaker, it’s important to serve the 30% of the audience who are right there on the same page as you are. They ARE attentive. They want to learn.

*  *  *  *  *  *

In recent weeks, my client Amanda has learned to set her own criteria for success.

She takes it in that when she gives a speech to 20 people and only two people have critical comments.

That’s 18 people out of 20 who gained value.

That’s good.

No—that’s great!

You can still practice different ways to reach as many people as possible.

For example, I have trained speakers to reach analytical people with a numbered list of methods. I’ve also guided them to have some friendly back-and-forth with audience members so that “relaters” (a personality style) can warm up to these speakers.

Be yourself.
Avoid becoming obsessed that some people did not hear you.
Practice methods to reach a spectrum of people.
Express what you’ve learned.

Do not toss your light under a garbage can just because some people cannot relate to your journey of learning and success.

Again – be yourself.

Warmly,

Tom

Tom Marcoux
CEO (leading teams in United Kingdom, India and USA)

Speaker-author of 40 books (with free chapters on Amazon.com )
Executive Coach
Spoken Word Strategist
Author of Time Management Secrets the Rich Won’t Tell You (See more when you CLICK HERE )
1.8 min. video (on YouTube): Tom Marcoux pulls back the curtain about how his directing a feature film that went to Cannes Film market helps with “Building Your Brand”:
Author of Connect: High Trust Communication for Your Success in Business and Life (See more when you CLICK HERE )